Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance Reflections
Healing the Divide between Men & Women
(My Lionheart Pack at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
It’s been just over a few weeks now since attending the Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance experience in Brinnon, Washington and yet the space it’s etched into my soul will remain forever.
I've been following the work of Sacred Sons for many many years now, applauding their massive efforts to support men worldwide in embracing divine masculinity, healing the masculine heart, and holding their fellow brothers as they crack their hearts open to feeling. I’ve also referred many friends to this organization and have continued to share their programs and work with my clients, men I know, and even former partners.
Because, if there’s anything sisters like myself have been yearning for — it’s the rise of the Divine Masculine on the planet. But of course, it’s up to every man to choose whether he will attend or even step into the arena of men’s work, for it requires massive courage to face one’s suppressed emotions, love, and fears.
So when Sacred Sons announced earlier this year they would be holding their first ever co-ed Convergence, my soul shouted an exuberant, ‘YES!”. There was no hesitation that I knew I was meant to be there, for many many reasons, which I’ll share below.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
THE JOURNEY TO REMEMBRANCE
Convoying down with my two dear sisters Stephanie & Kathy, our collective intentions were to really steep ourselves in the medicine of divine masculine energy. Being surrounded by the energy, leadership and presence of men doing men’s work is still relatively new in our current environment. While we have men’s work organizations in Vancouver (led by friends like Vern Petty of Expansive Man), most of the men drawn to these experiences here are easily a decade younger than myself. And as a woman pioneering work in sacred sexuality, divine union and ceremonial work — I long to be in community with older men who are embodying elder energy and leading men in healing work.
In usual fashion with my bestie from the westie Stephanie, we used the time in the car heading down to share our intentions for attending and building excitement as we stepped into the unknown. One of the things we both acknowledged was the deep ache to meet our Kings rooted in their penetrative protectorship, provision, and divine masculine presence. Having both experienced deep heartbreak and the inverse polarity, we’d both done lots of personal growth work over the years to embrace our feminine, root into our bodies, and place our faith in the Universe and God to deliver people suited for our long-term growth.
As we shared this while dancing in the car — apparently someone else driving alongside us did as well. The man in the car next to us seemed gobsmacked at our energy, evident in the smile plastered across his face. He proceeded to drive alongside us for many miles until we ended up at the same gas station. He then gave us money for being ‘so radiant & magentic’ as he described. We took this as a sign of us being in the right headspace for what insights would be illuminated at Sacred Sons.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
Surrounded by Incredible Men:
There were a few important reasons why I felt called to attend Remembrance. One of them being for the opportunity to be steeped in union work at a larger level. As a ritualist and supporter of divine union, I had been facilitating ceremonial healing work between men and women for the last two years. From my retreats, gatherings, workshops and online courses, one of the more important areas I saw a need for healing in society was simply for men and women to end the war between them. While this war is older than all of us, it can certainly end with us, and it begins in how we treat one another.
And of course, I would be lying if I didn’t share that on some levels I was attending Sacred Sons in order to potentially meet a potential aligned life partner. In fact, most of the women I spoke with seemed to echo that similar sentiment. Yet, it wasn’t just to meet any kind of man. It was to meet men who are doing their work, connected to their hearts, and part of a brotherhood that supports AND holds them accountable.
Some of the more common things I hear from women such as myself, women whom are confident, working on their personal growth, healthy, attractive and the whole package (in my opinion), feel very unmet by the average men they seem to come across in dating. The average complaints I hear from conscious women who are dating, using dating apps or calling in a partner are issues related to emotional avoidance, men only looking to ‘hook up’, those who are always looking towards greener grass, or men who aren’t emotionally and spiritually aligned.
And I get why.
Men are praised in society for earning lots of money but not necessarily for feeling their feelings. They are praised for sleeping with many women and taught how to ‘catch a woman’ but not necessarily supported in how to nurture a relationship. They are encouraged to work their way up the corporate ladder, but not how to kneel down to kiss the earth in gratitude. And in even conscious communities as I’ve seen in the last year, there hasn’t been a whole lot of accountability for when men act out of integrity (in a myriad of ways).
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
As we collectively begin to dismantle a system designed to separate us from each other and the planet, ‘the way’ will often have us confront beliefs that aren’t supportive of our authentic selves.
As an embodiment guide and ceremonialist, I’ve witnessed in my clients and men in the world how the ever increasing availability (and addiction) to porn has negatively impacted mens relationships with women. It’s one I’ve experienced intimately. These addictions and hurdles to nurturing real and authentic intimacy continue to be a compounding issue in the world at large, and its a challenge I feel personally called to help find solutions for.
And men are generally pressured from a very young age to bear the burdens of the world by themselves. It’s no surprise that suicide rates are the highest for men. A lot of pressure on men, but not a lot of support.
Which is why women like myself have been praying for organizations like Sacred Sons to continue spreading and expanding. Men’s work is, in my opinion, is saving the lives and hearts of men, together in brotherhood with brotherhood. And the work done in men’s work organizations has massive ripples in the world that positively impact everyone.
So attending the Sacred Sons Convergence cracked open some really beautiful prayers in my heart around the awakening of the Divine Masculine that I feel really honoured to have witnessed.
What I witnessed in the men present at C9:
The Mastery of their Sexual Energy: Having been in many many containers, retreats, festival environments, trainings and the like over the past 8 years, I’m very attuned to group fields. The men present at C9 were very energetically attuned, respectful and in control of their sexual energy (which is impressive given there were hundreds of men present!). No one was leaky with their sexual energy, and in fact, I felt so incredibly honoured and revered by the men because of that. Of course, from my understanding, there was lots of communication from the team with attendees to avoid issues or complications with having so many women in attendance. They also had us in separate camps and had a group agreement to abstain from sexual contact and exchange with each other, which I deeply respected and appreciated.
As one man shared with me (with some of my own wording), “Bringing in the feminine adds it’s own dynamic. It enlivens and enriches the field AND I had to stay super focused on WHY I came here —not to run around flirting and collecting numbers from the beautiful women here, but to heal, grow and put into practice everything I’ve been learning.”
Containment— these men put their containment into practice, which is always easier said than done.
And from this containment (from both sides really), it allowed everyone to honour and revere each other on a soul level—which is fundamental to building the foundation for a powerful relationship. Everyone came from a place of innocence, respect, and platonic presence vs. rushing connection, forcing intimacy, and accelerating the pace of the heart.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
Reverence for the Feminine: During our opening ceremony, the men created a spiral — a container for the feminine to feel safe and held within. As the women slowly walked into that spiral, we could meet each man’s eyes, and sense the reverence and respect they were creating for us to feel safe being there. It was a profoundly touching experience.
So when they announced after the ceremony that women and children would start eating in the dining hall first, the women’s shock and awe at this announcement gracefully thundered across the crowd.
Tears welled in my eyes as I felt the level of intention that went into this gathering to heal ancient wounds of mistrust, disrespect and abandonment. We all huddled in line whispering in surprise at this news and gratefully awaited the nourishing food being served, settling into the gratitude that was softening wounds the world had inflicted on us simply for being women in a man’s world.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
Honouring of the Elders & Children
Another beautiful touch that deserves its own paragraph was the intention that was woven into the weekend in resurrecting the essence of ‘village’, by weaving in not only women but also children of the leadership team. Because it was the first time (I believe) they were doing so, I imagine they were taking baby steps, though I can see a vision of what lies ahead for future gatherings.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
In our opening ceremony Vince ‘Matoska’ Chafin reminded everyone of the immense responsibility and burden of leadership, and how important elders are in being pillars of wisdom in community. He asked the Elders to bless and support the Sacred Sons team in their endevours to support all of the attendees. It was a potent reminder that we all need elders in our communities, those who energetically hold the values, dreams and wisdom to pass along to the next generation. It’s the reminder that age doesn’t neccesitate wisdom —where ‘Olders’ simply come into old age without feeling the reverence of passing along their knowledge, Eldership is a two-way street where that title is imbued into one by the community and accepted by the Elder.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
A Lions Heart: Joining My Pack
Of course, I knew it may happen. But I was separated from the two sisters I started this adventure with as I rolled up to admissions. My friends were inducted into the LightBeings crew with their yellow bandanas and I was inducted into the Lionheart Crew, led by Adam Jackson and others. It felt like an opportunity to lean into creating new connections and friendships, without having my familiar support system with me.
The energy of LionHeart fit mine perfectly though, and I stepped into the silent threshold of our group meeting the gaze of these new humans I’d be getting raw & vulnerable with, while our ceremonialist smudged my skin. Deep bows to Adam Jackson, Aidan, RonDon, Lunita, Stephanie, Micaela, and everyone else on our team who held such deep presence for us to drop into.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
A World Without Men & The Women’s Time:
At a certain point, the men and women were separated from one another to continue their work. We sent the men from our Lionheart group off into the forest with a blessing tunnel as the women stayed behind. I noticed a gentle shift in the energy of the women, a few deeply sighing. There had already been a lot of emotional waves many of us were surfing, and while there may have been a sense of relief to have just our women around us, I knew the absence of these men would be deeply felt (which is maybe part of the medicine).
(Our Lionheart Sisters: photo at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance taken by Phoebe of @soulfocus_media)
Women’s Sister Singalong:
Deep bows to the women’s team of the Lionheart Group who held it so impeccably for us to drop even more deeply into our feminine. Led by Lunita, Stephanie, and Micaela, we dove into the themes around the sisterhood wounds of competition, comparison and jealousy that can subtly infiltrate even the most grounded of women. We explored the archetypal themes for women to embody including the Lover, the Warrior/Mother, the Priestess, and the Queen archetype.
We bonded deeper with women whom we may have judged or avoided, and opened up more space in our bodies to receive.
In the evening while still in separation from the men, one of the most beautiful experiences of the weekend was gathering in the Sanctuary space to sing. Before the singing circle, I had sat in a cacao ceremony and was feeling rightfully blissed and a bit cracked open. I settled into the sanctuary space, tears already started trailing down my cheeks as I felt an ancient remembrance of what it was to gather with so many women in sacred expression of our voices.
Women used to be burnt alive for gathering in such ways. So the ancestral wounds and fears of expressing our heart’s medicine runs deep in the collective.
We sang songs for our grandmothers, mothers, and sisters. Songs on the wildness of women. Songs to sing our beautiful babes to sleep. And songs about love. As a few people remarked, regardless of where we live in the world, it’s amazing how many of the same songs we all knew and sang along to.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
Honouring the Return of the Masculine
(men singing as they began their return to the women - Song by Kale Kaalekahi)
Finally, it was time for the men to return back to the group and wow did we feel their absence! Everything felt amplified in the wake of their return. Women were feeling excitement & this energy was growing more and more palpable as us women ate together separately from the men in the dining hall.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
In preparation for their return after having had time to sit in women’s circles with one another, we learnt a special Hula dance from Kumu Anna Liza. As dozens of us gathered on a tree lined ridge overlooking the ocean to learn from her, we realized this wasn’t just a dance to honour the masculine. It was an opportunity to be steeped in ancestral Hawaiian cultural expression and soften into our feminine even more (though my body at times screamed at me during the 2.5 hour long lesson). Hula looks far easier than actual practice, and many of us remarked on how difficult some of the moves were to do than we initially thought.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
The time had finally come, and hundreds of us (around 150 or so) gathered on the ridge where the land meets the ocean. We heard them singing as they rounded the bend, and I could already feel the tears welling up in my eyes. This ancient way of honouring one another - brother and sister, man and woman, healing wounds in the collective we’d been tasked in healing through our lived expression, was profound.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
The men walked up singing —singing to their partners, singing to their children, singing to the women, and singing to the Divine Feminine. They formed a line in front of us, and we answered their call with our own response to their song. Back and forth, we sang to one another.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
The men then took a knee to us and the children, as first the children began with a song for the men, then two beings who went first in a Hula dance, and then the women sharing the Hula dance they’d learnt.
(Steph & I doing a Hula dance - photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
After this beautiful ceremony of honouring one another, the couples were then asked to come to the centre, and we blessed, affirmed, and honoured the power of Divine Union. Certain couples were acknowledged for having gone through their own fires of initiation in partnership, and it brought a special reverence out of me. Having seen men who’ve committed abuses, wrecklessly destroyed women’s hearts, or simply used and abused those I’ve loved and had no accountability in community, it was affirming to see men of honour and integrity acknowledged, and partnerships celebrated. This to me, was the power of brotherhood, in honouring the importance & reverence of love, partnership and being held by community.
(Steph, Kathy & I witnessing the Couples Acknowledgements at the Reunion Ceremony - photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
I’ve often reflected on how unions and couples would more likely thrive when really really held by community—especially in times of hardship.
We left the ceremony filled with joy spread across our faces, and celebrated with a delicious meal and ecstatic dance later that evening. The time apart, for both, was experienced as the space in which to more deeply focus AND to bring appreciation for what each other brings to the table.
Surprising Ritual Combat: Femme vs. Femme
Having reunited with the men the night before, our final full day of time together grew into a climax of powerful breakthroughs and beating bloody vulnerability. It was time for the men to see the vast rawness of what our wild dark feminine held and carried.
The men circled up as the sun crested the sky, and we were encouraged to step into the circle and let the men witness any anguish, grief, pain or anger that was still being held in our hearts. I myself had already had a pretty big release the week before (thanks to a Pisces full moon), where I’d gone to the beach to scream, rage, and feel deep grief for 7 hours. So needless to say I didn’t feel as much charge still in my system as some sisters did. Yet, the invitation to be witnessed in this expression of feminine darkness was beyond powerful, and was a rare opportunity for men to not only face this (without running away - which can often be the case), but actually to receive the medicine of such expression. Amidst the raging grief, yells, howls and anguish released from their bodies, the men were guided to just hold presence, without needing to try and fix anything.
Because, when men can acknowledge the deep grief, pain and suffering women experience being in this world, they can also extend that invitation for themselves to feel that. To be held with compassion and grace. To know that it’s ok to allow oneself to be witnessed in it.
And then we experienced the next level of that expression.
Before you start squirming & feeling protest arise as I share about the ritual combat, please listen to this Podcast Episode between Sacred Sons team Adam Jackson & Kale Kaalekahi speak on the deeper transformation ritual combat holds in facing fears and ones power. While this is practice is normally experienced by the men on their men’s only retreat, our group held space for any women that wanted to also experience this type of initiation.
We were first led in some more gentle warm-up practices by our Irish Sacred Sons team member David Patrick Farrell (or DPF for short;). Vulnerably sharing his own history of why he learnt combat & fighting, he shared valuable tips on how to defend oneself and the basics of boxing.
After the drills and partner practice, we circled up and allowed the women who wanted to courageously step into the ring to meet another sister in this way. Whew….there was a ton of inner conflict I was feeling. Obviously there were the tingles of fears I was naturally fearing, the taste of adrenaline beginning to settle on my tongue. Am I ready to step into the ring and experience this. Slowing down to tune into my body, she whispered, “babe - you’re bleeding right now….you should be lying in a red tent being massaged and fed grapes, not receiving impact onto your tender body.”
Having grown up as a sporty tom boy and someone who had to do a lot of work to listen to my feminine and body, I realized this particular initiation for me was not to stepping into the ring and pushing myself, but in slowing down and listening to the wisdom of my womb.
However, some other sisters felt ready to experience the medicine of facing their fears. Two by two, three times over, these women came into the circle, slightly sharing with fear, nervousness and excitement, and duked it out for 2 minutes. Instructed to hit only certain areas at 50% of their full power, it was a really honouring way of ensuring that ritual was more centered over hurting someone.
How to describe the myriad of surprising emotions that arose simply from watching these women face each other, it was a group ceremony that everyone was energetically participating in. As they closed, tears flowed, hugs were shared, and even one sister kneeled to the others feet - honouring the power they faced in themselves and their sister opponent. While I was admittedly nervous about this particular part of our weekend, I’m so grateful it was initiated.
Group Processing - Mistrust of the Masculine/Feminine
Another practice I was appreciated was a group dyad process that allowed us to share where we had last experienced distrust with the masculine/feminine and where we we felt newfound respect blooming for each other.
This was particularly emotional for me as I had to reflect on where I’d last lost trust in men. As someone who prides herself on being surrounded by really amazing men in my community, friends group and close circles, it stung to think I had attracted someone into my life who was not that.
It had been a full year (almost to the day) where I’d been hurt by a man whom I had been deeply in love with yet broke my trust and simply discarded me. Feeling this mistrust over his lack of integrity, I faced my partner in the dyad process and allowed any residual anger and sadness to flow from my tongue onto the earth. He received this transmission like a pane of glass, and simply held loving presence and gaze.
One of the other members in our group then shared his experience of mistrust with the feminine, and it allowed me to pause in contemplation of where I had embodied these faults and icks of the wounded feminine.
This process in particular for me felt like such a rare opportunity for each side to how we can inflict and put each other through deep pain, and how we can extend more compassion to one another.
A SACRED SYMBOL OF DIVINE UNION
We were in our final 24 hours of this weekend ceremony, and openheartedly, I knew there was one final surprise to affirm to me the deepest prayers I had been holding tenderly in my heart.
Walking around the property, I stumbled into the makeshift medic area, where a signup sheet announced there were tattoo artists adorning people with tattoos that weekend. Of course — a special tattoo commemorating this experience and that prayer was exactly the thing. As I left my name on the signup sheet, I bumped into one of our photographers and fellow Lionheart crew members Oso.
Oso, a remarkable human from the UK, he was there capturing the remarkable experiences we were having through his lens. Our brief chats were filled with our personal insights—especially his on what it was to weave the feminine in, and I had really enjoyed his comforting presence and welcoming energy. I was so curious to know how the feminine added to these containers, as I could imagine it added a whole new dimension of experience (and some challenges). He remarked how special this could be for me to receive a ceremonial tattoo and capture it on camera, and invited me to ask our other Lionheart member Luis if he’d be open to offering this sacrament.
As I took time to think about what symbol or design would be appropriate for this special occasion, a special leap of faith felt like the right thing to do. Luis was also another remarkable man on his own path of healing and power, and I took a liking to his quiet warmth immediately. In this unique situation, I asked Luis to come up with the symbol for what I was praying for. Each of my other tattoos held deep significance for me, symbols of transformation at different points in my life, so this one would be especially important in that I was trusting Luis (and God) in the affirmation I was to receive.
My first tattoo at 16 represented the source of my power & radiance, the tattoos I received while living in China—reminders of my soul’s ancient journey through time and special connection to those lands and Egypt, the tattoo of courage I received on my chest right before a meeting with a wild coyote in the desert, and many more.
But this time would be different. Just as I was placing my trust and faith in God to bring me a partner whom which I could journey in life with—I also entrusted Luis to receive the special symbol that represented the blessing of sacred love coming into my life.
Waking before sunrise, I walked in darkness to meet Luis and Oso, who would be filming the event, dropping into quiet contemplation. There had been many surprising illuminations this past weekend with everyone, and while I hadn’t felt like I’d met anyone with whom I felt that soul spark of divine love with, with a grateful heart, I felt like I’d received the gifts of community I was meant to receive.
Coffee in hand and eyes still sleepy, I asked Luis what symbol or art had come through for him. Of course, the simple significance of a ‘U’ representing Union, was the design that would adorn the back of my neck. Perfect! Small, simple and delicate, this was exactly what would represent the conscious intention I had been preparing myself for in experiencing devotional divine union.
Luis, Oso, and I made our way to the beach nearby, and settled ourselves onto the rocks. Creamy sunlit hues began lighting the horizon as he smudged my body and we said our prayers. His gun buzzing on my neck, I felt the energy of union being encoded not only into my body but also my soul.
The work complete and gratitudes shared, Oso captured our reflections on our experience at C9 and what it represented to us. Finally, for the first time, I shared a song to the ocean and sunrise on my newly crafted blood drum, officiating the newfound energy of trust and expression I’d be stepping into this new chapter with.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
Some of My Own Personal Reflections:
This writing wouldn’t be complete if I also didn’t share some of the deeper transformations I experienced and gained as a result of attending C9. As a woman on a growth path, I’ve invested tens of thousands of dollars into my growth over the past decade. Yet I’ve never felt like my ‘work’ is done. In fact, letting curiousity lead into new arenas of growth is what keeps one open, learning, and always evolving.
Instead of looking at growth as a path with an end-goal in mind, I seek to frame it as a lifestyle, one where continually shift between teacher and student, the one being led and the one leading, a sacred dance of shifting between polarity.
From courses in personal growth, communication, leadership, plant medicine ceremonies, spiritual trainings, energy healing…you name it - I have likely done it. Yet, there’s always room and space for more growth. Us humans need growth like we need water. Some of the medicine I harvested from this experience was this:
Sisterhood as Medicine: It’s one that’s always been top of the list for me. In fact, my first major time of spiritual and leadership growth happened when I began leading women’s circles and organized my first women’s conference with hundreds of women in Bali many many years ago. I know what it is to lean into the power of women, sisters, and fellow womb carriers. But women’s work is ongoing —it’s a daily practice of letting our guards down with each other and seeing what new iterations of judgment, criticism or power dynamics rear their head. Our work is to then be it with, alchemize it, and learn from it at each stage.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
As I slowly creep towards elderhood, I notice a subtle dynamic taking shape. It’s the appreciation of those in their maiden era and the desire to support them in how they need, versus ‘mothering’ from the energy that I know best. With age does come wisdom, and the Crone archetype (while least favoured by most women) is actually one that we most need. During convergence, I was very present to the subtle energetic shared above, and that there was also a whole spectrum of ages in the women present. While this could have steamrolled into a competition of age and beauty to capture the men’s attention, instead it morphed into a container of mutuality, friendship and sisterhood. Women held each other while tears shed, we honoured and appreciated the different expressions each women brought, and there seemed to be a deep reverence for the gifts each and every woman lay at the altar of intention.
Releasing expectation: As I always share in the experiences I facilitate and hold, boiling down our intentions to be as authentic to the principle as possible, helps us release attachments to expectations— as expectations can become burdens we project on others.
I had to face my burning desires for partnership and recognize I may not ‘meet my person’ at this experience. I actually had to make peace with that and get really honest with the core desires I could gently hold in my hand. Some of those intentions became: to receive the medicine of being around open-hearted men in their purpose and leadership and receive, connect with like-minded women, make new friends on a similar soul mission, and gain invaluable new skills and frequencies around supporting union in group ceremonies and settings. This perspective allowed me to fully drop into presence without projecting any expectations onto anyone—and receive the gifts each person I met offered.
Letting go of ancient grievances towards men: Look, as a woman, I recognize the deep ancestral wounds around men that have been passed along bloodlines. In my opinion, much of the anger and hatred towards men stems from grievances older that time by those who are long since dead. Like compounding interest from the past, these wounds towards men are like massive boulders rolled downhill gathering more steam by our own anger, mistrust, and grief.
Myself included. From a violent grandfather who raped, abused, and violated women, to my own father who was abused and later neglected his fatherly duties towards me growing up, I’ve accepted that my forgiveness load is greater than some. And it’s less than others. It is mine and mine alone. That said, the amount of personal growth work I’ve had to continually do in relationship to the masculine has felt extraordinary.
I feel grateful to say I’m now surrounded by really amazing men in my life as friends, community members, and even family, who exemplify the kind of healing masculine energy the world needs.
And that’s likely a reflection of the work I’ve had to do in: not belittling men to other women (this is a common form of disrespect like: ‘all men this’, ‘men are always like…’). These common forms of reinforcing negative tropes around men simply continue false narratives that operate in women’s lives.
While I’m excited to see this personal growth work around men translate into romantic relationships, for now, I’ll continue doing the excavation of mistrust towards men that has specifically been unearthed in former relationships and/or continue the compassion work of forgiving those who’ve consciously or subconsciously hurt me. What I did experience at Sacred Sons was moments in hearing men’s desire to heal past hurts, to hold space for hurt they didn’t create or to simply be the kind of men we can trust. That reignited a trust in men deeper than I’ve known, and for that I’m so grateful I got to receive it deep into my being.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
The Real Work Moving Forward:
The closing ceremony the next day heralded a special moment for me (for everyone I think), where we truly felt the powerful work of healing that had been done between men and women. The deep repair work on behalf of the collective is what really drew me to this experience, and is the medicine I received. Repair work that acknowledged hurt and pain caused, but also sought to seek a way forward—instilling newfound trust, respect and hope.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
As emotions rose into a crescendo of woops, hollers, tears, and silent reverence, we all huddled into a close knit circle surrounding the Sacred Sons Team. “Look to the sky —see if you can spot our angels”, Adam Jackson announced. “Aliens, UFOS, angels? —what the heck am I trying to make out?” I joked in my mind. We all sat in silence squinting into the sky for what felt like a long time (but was really only a few minutes). “Keep looking”, he said.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
And then I spotted them! We all spotted them. Two skydivers appeared, encircling us above, with streams of red and blue behind them. Finally touching down upon the ground near us, their Sacred Sons emblazoned parachutes streaming behind them.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
Damn, what a theatrical ending and flair they brought to the closing ceremony! I loved it.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)
Closing thoughts
Yes, men & women’s work held in separate containers continues to be valuable — iron sharpening iron and women softening into their feminine together. There are special ways that men and women bond together in only one another’s presence that cannot be overlooked.
AND what we’re now needing more than ever is opportunities to put our emotional, spiritual and psychological work into practice—together.
Just as there’s no amount of preparation and healing work that can ever truly prepare you for the challenges of what you’ll actually experience in a romantic relationship (though there’s many resources you can apply), there is only so far you can go in your healing through men and women’s work before you can actually put it into practice.
The future of men and women’s work does include a third space where we can come together in unity, compassion and understanding.
THIS is where the soul of Village can begin to come back online for us. Where we can understand where we fit into the greater whole, that we are all essential, valuable and needed.
Where we can become the stand for peace we desire in our hearts and on the planet.
Where do we go from here?
I don’t know.
But I hope it looks more like this.
(photo taken by Cam Naga at Sacred Sons Convergence 9: Remembrance)